Monday, July 14, 2008

Wedding Planner

I've been to a lot of weddings and receptions recently. Most of my friends are married or will be married soon. Some of my younger siblings are married. While I can't say I am good at getting married, I do feel like I'm getting really good at going to wedding receptions. I can be part of the wedding group (denoted by an "outfit") or I can be just an average spectator, either way. I bring a lot of versatility to the table. Given my vast experience base, I feel quite qualified to give a few pointers to anyone who is planning a reception in the near future.

1. Colors
Let's start with the basics here. A common mistake on the color front is to choose overused hues like blue, pink, red, etc. So 20th century. If you're really looking for a special day, go with something original, like tan and dark gray. Definite hit.

2. Music
This was basically all I wanted to talk about in the first place. I was thinking today about the song Lady in Red, by Chris De Burgh, and how it is without question one of the worst songs of all time. Then I thought, wouldn't it be awesome if somebody used that at their wedding reception? Like, in Panguitch? That would be perfect! Big bangs, tan and dark gray outfits, and Lady in Red on the wedding video. "We met at a church dance in the eighth grade, and this has been our song ever since." True, by Spandau Ballet, and Never Gonna Give You Up, by Rick Astley, could complete the playlist.

3. Ball Caps

The feel of a wedding, the look of NBA draft day. What could be better? Looking back on Laura's wedding, this is probably the moment that The Boy and I are most proud of.

4. Wild Kids
Really, a reception's not a reception without a small band of kids running amuck. I have it on good authority that at a recent reception, one of my young cousins was seen filling his pockets with the chocolate fountain. This is by far the best way to give the happy couple a preview of the joys of parenting that await them.

That should probably do it for now. I also have great insights regarding the menu, wedding group roster, venue, invitations, etc., but those all figure into my billable hours, so I won't share them here.

6 comments:

Josh and Lar said...

The chocolate fondue in the pocket has to be one of my best wedding memories of all time! All I can say is that your future wife is going to have to a difficult time planning a "normal" wedding. I can just see you purposefully suggesting really strange ideas - partly to rebel from the normal Utah weddings, partly just to see your fiance get uncomfortable.

lisa said...

jae. please give more insight into receptions. all i can say is that you might need to plan my wedding.

Diana Hulme said...

Stop it. You're killing me.
You didn't mention that little noah kid at cara's wedding who took off at full speed with the tablecloth attached and pulled it all off.

Kelly said...

omg nick and i have officially agreed that you are the funniest kid alive. Sorry our wedding wasn't quite up to par with your "wedding expert-ness". i have to say my favorite was the wholesomeness of the alfredo post. You are slightly hilarious (and not cynical AT ALL) oh and ps. is laura pregnant? In one post you said something about her "naming the babe" just wondering... tell her congrats if so! we look forward to more hilarious and entertaining posts!

cameo said...

Hmm, good luck finding a girl who is going to agree with that stuff!

Unknown said...

Jae, I am going to hire you as a wedding planner. What's your going rate?